He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Houston, we have a squirter
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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