It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
