yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize