Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize