and you said cock pushups were impossible
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
