i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
