Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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