10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize
