3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize