I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Can I color on your dick again?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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