I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize