Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
