I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
