youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
