It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
