This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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