I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
