No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
