Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
