Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
