I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize