dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
