never play flip cup with pint glasses
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
