The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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