it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
