My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
