can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
this beer tastes like vomit already
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
