Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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