Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
the day after is always just damage control
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
PANTIES FOUND
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