So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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