Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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