How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
