dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
