I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize