shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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