if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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