508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
