Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
The best revenge is premature balding
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
