Only a mothe r could love this liver
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
