After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
