i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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