The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
