The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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