what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
