he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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