he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
