can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize