Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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