So drunk its hurt
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
