if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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